


He Wandered, Never Alone

by Evilchuckle



Category: teen wolf - Fandom
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Gen, Trans Character, ftm Sheriff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-12
Updated: 2013-05-12
Packaged: 2017-12-11 16:28:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/800771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evilchuckle/pseuds/Evilchuckle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John wasn't expecting much from life, not really. Just that the woman he date not be a lesbian, that he could use the men's restroom, and he referred to as 'he'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Wandered, Never Alone

**Author's Note:**

> I should mention there is off screen incest, and child abandonment. There is also a character who is shot and paralysed. These are not focal points of the story just giving you fair warning. This is unbeated so any mistakes you'd like corrected just let me know.

When he was a boy growing up there was a lot less acceptance than there is today. Although there are pitiful amounts today. 

He couldn’t get married, he and his partner would never be able to adopt. Both their families disowned and abandoned them. When his wife, no matter what the law said, lay  
dying he was never allowed to see her- not being family. 

It was only when he left for college that John dare start introducing himself as John. He may have been down officially as Lucy but his friends all knew him as John. 

The first time a lecturer connected Lucy Matthews with John Matthews was a clusterfuck of epic proportions. He was called in to see a councillor, his parents were informed, all his lecturers were informed, his peers were informed. 

His parents disowned him then and there. They never tried to get back in contact. He was jeered at lecturers, mock by friends. People often told him he was confused and was just a tomboy. He joined a local LGBT group and they just told him he was a lesbian. He was always referred to as ‘she’ or ‘her’. 

He transferred to USF, hoping that in San Francisco he would be more accepted. To some extent he was. He explained himself to the university that while he may have female genitals he was a he. They gave him so much information. 

The media never showed trans people and what literature he could find never helped. There was no information readily available to him. He was given the name of specialist councillor who worked at the university that could help him. He knew logically he wasn't the only person to feel like this but it was nice to see they existed.

At USF’s LGBT group he met other trans people. It was liberating. But it was far from perfect; his first girlfriend was a lesbian. They broke up when he realised she didn’t see him as a man. His next girlfriend broke up with him when he wouldn’t let her touch him. 

Graduating with an art history degree and an overwhelming sense of now what, John bought an old cop car and toured the country. 

He met Sasha Stilinski at a bar in New Orleans. She was serving and awestruck at all the travelling John had done. She had met plenty of travellers before and envied them as she  
had never left the city. They enchanted each other and both left the next morning. 

It took two weeks. They were camping out somewhere in the New Mexican dessert. Sasha has ran out of tampons. What resulted was a sleepless night of tears, unwrapped bindings, and love. 

Sasha didn’t claim to understand but she was supportive. For the first time somebody had found out and then continued to call him ‘he’. 

In Chicago she bought him a strap on. In Portland he fucked her with it. In Austin a mugger mistook the old cruiser for an active one. They joined the police force there. 

The academy was hell for both of them. They were both treated as young women, lesser than the men. Useless and weak. They both proved them wrong. Both graduated and were assigned to the same station. 

It was hell for John. He spoke to the chief and explained his situation. The chief didn’t want to even try and understand. He called all the uniforms on shift together and explained that Matthews was a ‘guy’. Nobody missed the mocking tone or John’s humiliation. 

But he stayed on not willing to be shamed and chased away. His partner Tony humoured him. At the end of the day John was on the force, one of them, and they looked out for him. 

Not being able to get married John changed his name to Stilinski, neither wanting anything to do with the family that abandoned John. Despite knowing it wasn’t a marriage, their friends on the force still held them a party. They got rings and went on a honeymoon to Niagara Falls. They knew the other was all they wanted in life. And if the law wouldn’t let them show their public commitment to each other then they’d just do it their own way.

It all changed when Sasha was shot. Paralysed from the waist down she was angry. She felt so useless. She had gone from independent strong woman, upholding the law, saving lives, and kicking butt. To feeling weak, defenceless, and helpless. She raged at John, at idiots with guns, at the world. 

Her parents moved in with John and Sasha as soon as she was out of the hospital. They tried to help with everything. She hated it. The only person she allowed help from was John. He didn’t treat her different because she couldn’t use her legs, he treated her as he had always done, as the love of his life.

He didn’t fuss when she left the house alone, he didn’t stop her from cooking, and he didn’t act as if she had lost her brain along with her legs. So when she got her insurance pay out she had no qualms about using it to pay for John to have hormone treatment. 

When Sasha’s parents found about John being a 'freak' and their daughter a 'lesbian' they took off. They appeared briefly after she died trying to get custody of Stiles, claiming there was no way he was a fit parent. The judge laughed them out of court. There was no way he would remove a child from a loving parent after just losing one. Not to mention that the Stilinski’s had no way support the child, was not prepared to move save uprooting him. However the biggest deciding factor was the way he would cling to his father screaming if his strange unknown grandparents would try to get near him. 

With the testosterone pumping through his veins John felt far more settled than he ever had before. They moved to a rundown bungalow and Sasha started to do it up. Eventually she opened up a business converting bungalows, making them more accessible for disabled and elderly people. She made a decent profit from this. It was through this business that she met Mark.

Mark had a sister who had just moved to the Virgin Islands leaving her blind father, overworked brother, and newborn son behind. At first Sasha would just babysit the boy until one day Mark didn’t pick him up. 

John looked into it. 

The old man had died while Mark had moved to live with his sister. He had left a note giving all parental rights to Sasha Stilinski. Further digging showed Mark was most likely the baby’s father and uncle. This helped Sasha get the adoption through quicker. The courts not wishing to deal with the taboo of incest rushed the case, which meant that John Stilinski was legally the baby’s father. 

Years later John would wonder if it was this history that inspired Stiles to his nickname. That he wanted to cement himself in as a Stilinski. 

They were always open within the family as to this history but outside they kept it quite. Children can be nasty and parents even more so. Baby Alekos grew up healthy. Apart from ADHD diagnosed in his pre-teens, and frequent ear infections Alekos was perfectly healthy. 

By the time Alekos was six and demanding to be called Stiles, Sasha was sick. But she kept it from her boys. John had had top surgery and was preparing for bottom. Stiles needed an ear tube inserted or he risked future hearing loss. Neither was covered by their insurance. 

When Stiles finally saw his Mommy’s mole and asked his Daddy why is was so funny looking the cancer had already been ravishing her body for over a year. John had been furious with her but she hadn’t minded. She only broke down once in front of John. He was visiting her in the hospital and he had come without Stiles. Stiles had another ear infection and the doctors didn’t want to risk her fragile health. 

It wasn't platitudes or declaration of love that calmed her down, it was John standing and peeing in a cup. He had a functioning penis.

When she was told she had a year to live they all hopped in an old VW motorhome and toured the country. Stiles was regaled with PG stories of his parents’ time travelling. 

Eventually they settled in a small town in California. 

Sasha died and John wasn’t allowed in. Stiles had sat holding his mom’s hand while his father was outside arguing with the staff. When checking in her to the hospice they had found out they were not married. So John was not allowed access, these final days are for family they drone at him. Even coming in in his new Deputy uniform and with his son begging for his daddy was not enough. 

By the time he stood for election John was tired and world-weary. He knew he was throwing himself into work but at this point he didn’t care. Despite Sasha’s sacrifice Stiles was still slowly losing his hearing. They had mounting debts and no-one in Beacon Hills to lean on. 

When he woke up one morning to find that Deputy Thompson, also standing for the Sheriff position, had ‘outed’ John as a woman he couldn’t help but laugh. Tempted to just give in, take Stiles and live a transitory lifestyle, where they could never be hurt again, John was tired and finding himself called into Stiles’ school was no help. 

It was bemusing to watch as the Principal explained. Stiles was defending his father’s manhood. There was a small blonde child with a bloody nose and no sympathy. All the teachers had told him off, his own parents had told him off. John was treated like the man he was. 

When the election result was in and John won as he was the better cop he cried. He had finally found acceptance. People didn’t care that he was ftm only that he was good at his job and an even better father. 

He had found what he and Sasha were always looking for, and he had found it without her.


End file.
